The Course of Life
by Katheleen.Cullen
Summary: Edward moves to Forks hoping to put a troubled past behind him. There seems like no hope until he meets Bella. After an unfortunate event Bella is left alone until 6years later when Edward returns. Edward realizes he is not the only one living a new life.
1. Chapter 1 Blurred Gaze

**Hey everyone, this is my first fanfic. I have really enjoyed doing this first chapter, so I would really appreciate it if you could please leave some feedback. There will be more chapters coming very soon. Have a good read!**

The Course of Life

EPOV

**Preface:**

And both desire and pain ghostly drifted out from my body leaving me absolutely nothing to cling on to this time. Hollow. Leaving me the numb feeling I had once felt long ago. Mindlessly, I granted her wishes.

EPOV

**Chapter 1- Blurred Gaze**

I was expecting the drive to our new home to be a complete disaster. I expected the sun to peek impatiently behind the clouds; meaning many of the people of Forks would be outside to peer at our removal van and wonder what kind of family is moving in. But the window, painted with rain, offered the site of the weather- it was obviously on my side. I rested my head on the window. Now my muscles eased a bit, content that our van would be the last thing on people's minds.

My grandmother, June, forgot to mention the most important detail of this move; that Forks weather was most of the time grey and wet, the type of weather that allows me to stay inside my shelter without feeling guilty that other kids are sharing their time with their loved ones.

Of course Alice despised these weather conditions and perhaps that is why June decided to mention it until we were only streets away from our home. But of course neither Alice nor June cared for what they wanted, this move was for me. This place was for me apparently, they believed it might make me happier so they wouldn't dare deny me of this move.

"Well sure...I can adapt to this weather, I'm sure it'll be great huh Edward?" Alice looked at me through the rear view mirror forcing a smile as she spoke. Her attempt to try was nice however- even though she's my sister- most people would have faltered on me. "Yep" I mumbled back still glancing outside, hoping that silence would find its place within the van again.

June pointed up ahead, "it's this left coming up Alice" As Alice turned I lifted my head up to see the road we would now belong to. I tried tousling my hair in place, feeling the icy temperature of the window against my hand. The cold was a nice contrast to my warm clammy hand.

The road didn't fit my expectation. I imagined the houses built close to each other as if we lived in a prison where we had no room to ourselves. Yet my eyes focused away from my expectation and I saw that the houses were separated apart enough that I would feel plenty of privacy. Hm, I was surprised by how much was going my way, the weather now the road on my side- 2 for Edward, 0 for Forks. Yep, I was beginning to like the idea of living here. My eyes were jumping quickly from one house to another as Alice sped down the road, making the brown and white colours which wrapped around the houses morph together in a blur.

Our pale white coated house stood on the right side of the road. Alice began pulling into the drive way, but for a moment my eyes ignored the house and were preoccupied with what laid across the house. My head turned swiftly in curiosity and my eyes widened at the beauty- a dark misty green forest stared straight back at me. The dusky brown and green which gleamed from the forest twisted together in a glistening dance as the wind brushed slightly through it. The trees stretched behind the houses on the left side, stretched far off to the distant, far off into an unseen destination. A smile crept silently on my face as I stared at this inviting place; I could go into its mouth, alone, let out my feelings and it would blow my whispers down deeper through the forest, deeper to where it ends, in a place my eyes could not reach.

Our road was long, with normal houses, nothing original, just a normal place that really had no impact on me. Not even the exotic flowers- which grew pageantry on many lawns- could make me see positive. I sighed and slid out of the car finally my attention on our home whom I greeted with closed arms.

Since I was the only man now in the family I carried our luggage into the house.

From behind a voice startled me "Here Edward, let me help you with this".

"Alice I've got it! Do you really think I am that incapable of doing things?" I turned, my dark eyes glared at her; however I felt softness bubble deep down underneath my harsh glare. She shrugged her shoulders and coolly walked back into the house. I knew she simply wanted to be helpful in any sort of way to me, but the bubbling still ceased as I turned away from her. She understood why I was this person.

A few minutes after I was done a removalist helped me with the larger furniture while Alice and June were busy unpacking. Judging from the charcoal shade in the sky moving in took the whole day.

I walked slowly down the short hall way and up ahead my room existed, the furthest away from the living. My room was very wide and long, the largest. "Do you like!" a high pitched voice said surprising me from behind. I flinched. The element of surprise was Alice's specialty, especially as she had the advantage to be petit, so silence came naturally to her.

"Yeah it's...big, I mean wow I-I think I feel a great big bubble of happiness overwhelm me because of you're big heart sis" I spat out sarcastically, patting her black short hair that stabbed at my hand. She grunted and tried stomping away, but no noise came from her steps and then her bedroom door slammed.

As I began unloading some of my belonging a soft fist knocked on the door. "Come in" I replied to the knock. June slowly opened the door, her fragile hand clutched onto the golden door knob. I couldn't help by stare at her translucent weak skin where plum coloured lines- her veins- stood out, probably pulsing slower and slower each day, until soon...- I shook the thought away instantly before it grew any larger.

"Edward love, dinner is ready downstairs; will you be eating with us tonight?" She spoke softly, her eye brows frowned in a sympathetic expression.

"Sure, I'll be down there" I replied back monotonously, which was not deliberate but a tone which became natural to me now. I saw a smile try hike its way up her soft skin, which in some creases overlapped. A swift pain poked at me for being nice, silly huh? Hurting because of kindness.

The smell of my grandma's home made spaghetti lured me down the stairs. I sat down around the small varnished round table, which probably had room only for one small person. Alice served me but her eyes did not reach my face, I know she'll forgive me soon, that's the type of person she is. The warm food felt nice in my mouth from the long day. I began eating faster because I could not harness my hunger but also because a conversation was bound to begin from this stretching silence.

"So are you both excited for school tomorrow?" Yep, June didn't like the silence. I knew that question was more aimed towards Alice, as she knew that I'm not the sort of person to be excited anymore. Besides, I had a mouthful of spaghetti in my mouth so Alice had to answer.

"I heard the school is pretty good and I suppose making new friends will be sort of fun" Alice chirped. Then she got a bit serious "It's mine and Edward's last year of school, we should make the most of it" I swear she shot a nasty glance towards my direction. I began jittering in my seat, I don't think I'm going to like where this conversation will end up.

It felt like a whole long minute before finally June's fragile voice spoke; "Aww you two are growing up so fast. We should hold an end of year celebration, which I think you can take perfectly care of Alice".

"A graduation party, yeah that would be great! I should start thinking about ideas on the design of the house and..." Alice's voice started to fade in my ears. I tried blocking out all the noise and when I looked up at the young and old their mouths moved soundlessly. A silent movie I was witnessing.

To let the food settle I laid stiffly on my bed and listened to the noises around me. Cars screeched outside, their tyres fighting against the wet road. The wind's soprano voice echoed around the trees, around our house and tapped impatiently on my bedroom window. The shower was being used; the water pipes rattling in ache. But here inside my bedroom was silence. Mm, already I began feeling at ease with this place. I began thinking about the forest, so I got up from my bed, sat down at the desk in front of the window and took out my drawing pad and pencils. The forest seemed to stare back at me from across my window. A burning of desire began to glow inside of me. It formed in my stomach and then it rose to my fingers and then the pencil touched the page.

I observed the way the trees leaned in together, as if each branch from every tree supported each other. How each leaf appeared connected to every other leaf which grew in this surreal forest. The pencil continuously patted the paper with light marks of lead as I tried to capture the top of the trees-detailing each shadow of the night that rested in the creases of the leaves. The pencil haltered. I leaned my head back to observe my half drawn picture, and was quite pleased at how well I imitated what I saw. I slipped the unfinished work into a plastic sleeve folder accompanying my other drawings. I plummeted into bed once the lights were off- to prepare myself for the mental struggle that awaited me tomorrow- my first day at Forks high school.

**Thanks for reading, please let me know what you think.**

**Kath:)  
**


	2. Chapter 2 Trying To See

**Hey, this is my 2nd chapter. I hope you are enjoying the story so far. If you are interested to know what happens in the following chapters-soon to come, please add me to your alert list. Enjoy.**

The course of life

EPOV

**Chapter 2- Trying To See**

A soft light patted against my eyelids, probably the morning light letting me know it was no longer night. My eyes slowly opened and a grey glittering shine came through the window sneaking through the gaps of my hair that slept on my forehead and shined into my eyes. This was the morning I have not been looking forward to; first days are not exactly the wish you make as you blow your birthday candles out.

Alice and June were already in the kitchen eating their breakfast and talking about their sleepless night. "All I could hear was my teeth chattering away, for a second I thought they were going to crack!" Alice said to June, eyes wide in amazement.

"Did you know I put spare quilts in the cupboard?"

"Gran...I was sleeping with spare quilts two spare ones to be exact!"

Their eyes shifted towards me as I sat down with my bowl of cereal.

"Morning" They both smiled at my voice and then Alice continued.

"But I'm sure tonight will be much better I'll know what to expect and wear double layers if it comes down to that". Her eyes softened again as she looked at me. I rolled my eyes in my mind. Did I miss something or is there a subtext to her speech which is-_Edward my night sucked but I'll deal with it so you can be happy...you better try be happy. _Accidentally, a chuckle slipped out. They both stared with worried faces,

"Oh I'm just startled to hear you had a bad night" I lied. "I slept peacefully actually".

"That's great to hear honey do you think-"

"Hey the time! We've got to go soon Edward" Alice jumped out of her seat as she interrupted June and tugged at my pyjamas as if telling me to hurry up and change.

Once I was ready we kissed June goodbye on the cheek and set off. Alice looked at me and then at the removal van, and then back at me "I think I would prefer walking, you?"

"I couldn't agree with you more" I nodded. Even if I was allowed to drive, I would not want to create more attention with that van and Alice hadn't been able to afford her own car. Plus we passed the school yesterday and it didn't seem a far distance to walk.

"Alright I bet you ten bucks that it'll take twenty minutes to walk" I poked the bet at Alice. We were still walking on our long road and my eyes could not see the corner we'd have to take in order to be on the school road, so I was confident with my estimation.

"Your on buddy, I say fifteen minutes, and no delay with the payment this time please. I expect it in my hand once we've reached the school gates" she stretched her head up to show me her confident smile as if she really thought she had a chance. I laughed shaking my head at her.

There was a large amount of cars driving pass us along the road which led to the school. Cars began pulling into the parking area and my stomach churned at the site of strangers. I could feel Alice's gaze on my face as we nearly reached the gates. She probably had the same thought as me- _It's okay Edward just be yourself don't be ashamed everyone goes through rough times. _I let in one big mouth of air and sighed it all out, and then we were inside the school grounds. Alice still looked at me so I turned at her in confusion.

She smiled animatedly** "**pay up brother, eleven minutes, I was the closest". Maybe we didn't have the same thing on our mind after all.

"I'll pay for lunch how about that?"

"Ah Edward how did I know you'd escape this, hm, because I've won too many to know you don't pay up?" Alice was right she always won our bets and I never paid.

Students flocked the school in their own groups; mingling around the entrance of the school, and around their cars, with their stern gaze at the two new students. Well so much for the van not being noticeable yesterday, this was worst- 2 for Edward and 1 for Forks.

"Why Edward, a few looks from the girls I see"

"What do you mean?" my face turned red.

"You know what I mean."

"Wouldn't you be looking if aliens came from the sky and greeted humans with their presence?"

she rolled her eyes "Edward, I am a female, I know what look that is, no need to be embarrassed you are the attracting gender to them, its bound to happen one day. Don't worry I wont tell grandma" she blurted out with laughter and shoved me a little bit, great more eyes on us as we entered the building.

"Cya later, I'll meet you out the gate!" Alice said as she walked fast ahead as if she had a bunch of friends already impatiently awaiting her arrival. I stood half dead in the hallway looking at my new timetable. With my concentration on only one thing –to get this day over and done with- I walked down through the hall to find my first class.

Today was Wednesday so I had English first with Mr. Highland. I sat at the back of the class where a lot of empty seats accompanied me. Whispers grew in the class and I saw heads turn towards my direction. I wonder if they trying to be subtle. A boy with spiky blonde hair smiled at me so I returned the favour. I found out his name was Peter from the roll. English class went fast, the teacher talked about Geoffrey Chaucer, whom I studied before, and the whispers ceased as the teacher spoke. Midway through the class I began feeling like part of the furniture. This made the sick feeling retreat from my stomach as I could just do the same in my other classes.

I tried spotting Alice in the cafeteria, and was only just able to spot her petit form amongst a crowd of girls and boys. Of course Alice would have lots of friends already; she brightened the room with her personality. Hopefully my name won't get mentioned in any conversations. I decided to eat lunch outside in the cool Forks wind. I could have sat with people from any of my classes today but I didn't want to be asked where I'm from, what I do in my spare time and about my...family. To quickly distract my thoughts I decided to start on homework.

Before I knew it the last subject, which was sports, was over and I went to meet Alice. It was a good way to end this day which I'd been dreading because as we played basketball no one tried to pry into my life, we just played as if we've all known each other from the start of high school.

"How was the first day kids?" June asked as we walked into the house.

"Not that bad" I replied going up the stairs to have a shower.

"Great" Alice sung, making my reply seem lifeless.

Downstairs June sat on the lounge flipping through a garden magazine and Alice sat with her watching the TV. I didn't always want to spend my time away from them locked inside my room so I decided to join them even though the TV didn't interest me so much.

"Are you planning to renovate the garden?" I said sitting down beside them.

June looked up with a smile; I don't think I've met anyone who smiles more than her. "Well yes and no. I'm looking for plants and designs for our garden but no I won't be doing the work of course" her eyes peered down at her fragile body, obviously incapable of any arduous labour. "But I was speaking to this neighbour who has a very lovely garden and she told me that this girl who lives on this street, Irena, does her garden for a very cheap price. I think she said the girls in your grade?"

I shrugged and shook my head; I wouldn't have remembered anyone's name today besides Peter.

"Nope don't know her" Alice said, eyes still on the TV.

June slowly sat up more and continued "Well I already talked to the sweet girl and she's going to come every Friday after school, so make her feel welcomed". I'm glad June already seemed happy here; it made me feel less guilty for being responsible for this move to the grey Forks.

That night in bed I felt ashamed for being so worried about school. The students didn't appear all that bad, and who cares if I can't exactly relate to them; I would forget about them once schools finished anyway. Hm, I wonder if Alice and June were struggling to sleep right now, I hope one day I can make it up to them, once I'm myself again, hopefully some day soon. I had no problems sleeping that night though. Soon enough my eyes grew heavier, and my room began to blur and I drifted into sleep, my second night in Forks.

**Thanks for reading, let me know what you think.**

**Kath :)  
**


	3. Chapter 3 Buried View

**My 3****rd**** chapter is finally done! To find out more about Edward's experience at Forks high school, about who the gardener is and about when Edward will meet Bella read this chapter, and then discover more as the 4****th**** will be out very soon. **

**Have a pleasant read!**

The Course of Life

EPOV

**Chapter 3- Buried View**

The second day at school felt completely long and painful. This was due to two reasons. 1- Forks actually experienced a day with sun, so my usually isolated spot was filled with herds of students trying to catch each sun ray on their skin while it lasted. Their laughter and happiness echoed around me creating pain for my ears and eyes, not because I detested happiness, I simply envied them. And number 2- the weekend was coming up and I just _had _to occupy my time with something, because as I realised before we moved to Forks, having nothing to do on the weekend is like digging the hole to your own grave; the thought of Alice and June huddled around me trying to get me out of bed, crying for me just made me cringe.

That afternoon me and Alice bought some flowers June had asked for, since the renovation of our lawn was to begin tomorrow. I was glad to be with Alice and not alone with June in the house. That thought made me feel awful but sometimes I feel like Junes watching my youthful movement, remembering when she use to be like that, looking at what has passed her and what she has become, and what she will never be again. I shivered; I hope I don't feel that way when I'm an old man in my eighties.

"So will you two be making plans together for the weekend?" It was a question but I knew if June could, she would have forced us to make plans together.

"Well me and my friends were going to catch a movie" Alice said with a heap full of dinner in her mouth. I could see June's disappointed face. "But you could come Edward, they all know I have a brother and they wouldn't mind they're very nice people." I think she realised she couldn't convince me. "Well ah I can always cancel my plans, another day I'll tell them." She smiled at me and June smiled at her. Then, aside from the ache I've had to cope with all week, another one shot through my body, one of guilt which made my heart feel like it contained stones. My family continued to put their feelings ahead of mine when I could offer them nothing in return. I wonder how long it will be until I can repay them. I realised they were waiting for me to say something.

"Yeah we'll see Alice, maybe I'll find my own thing to do so no need to worry this time" I half smiled back at both of them.

Friday at school was like a carbon copy of Thursday and even though I had not planned my weekend I was still relieved that I was in History, my last subject for the week. Before the class started I prepared my notes. My mind began drifting off into a swirl of different thoughts; about the upcoming weekend, and about the obscure feeling inside of me, that I did not notice when a girl took the empty seat next to me.

"Hey my name's Jessica"

"Hi, Edward" I answered lifting my head slightly up from the page, hopefully she got the hint that I was not interested to talk.

"I'm not in anyone's seat am I?" Was this a joke? Surely she would have noticed I was the only living thing at the back of the classroom.

"Just my friend *Harvey" I mumbled, laughing in my head- Ow. However she looked up to the door as If she expected someone to ask for his seat back, she mustn't have understood my joke. **[**_*** Harvey- a movie about a man who has an invisible friend resembling a man sized rabbit, named Harvey.]**_

"You have a sister named Alice right? You two are the family who are new right?"

"Yes and... yes". She giggled at my response; I wasn't trying to be funny.

"She's really nice and she's told me so many things about you that I thought it wasn't fair that we talk about someone who I barley know".

I looked at her in surprise; I hope Alice controls her tongue next time. I just nodded my head. If there was an award for the ideal conversationalist I would not be in the nomination list.

"So how do you like Forks? I love the place; I've lived here most my life actually. The weather could be better I suppose, I like the sun a lot, but you do get use to it, well even if you don't like it now the place starts getting to you that I'm sure you won't want to leave. Are you planning on moving again anytime soon?"

Man I hope she doesn't fail to remember how to breathe; I'm not prepared to give mouth to mouth. "Um I'm not sure, not that I know of"

"Okay great! Well if you're ever bored and you don't know what you can do just ask me, I know about every great thing to do- sorry am I talking too much? I promise I'll keep quiet" she laughed a bit. Yes please, please keep your promise. From the corner of my eye I saw her come close to me, my first reaction was move away so I flinched in the other direction but then I realised that she was...what why was she writing her number down?

My face must have illustrated my thoughts "oh you know just in case you want to know what stuff to do around here, just ring and I'll let you know because- oh sorry." She put her finger to her lips realising she broke her promise.

"Thanks" That reply was both to her number - which I wouldn't call even if I did have a bad weekend - and because hopefully she would be silent now. The pain still howled in my head.

Immediately when I arrived home I laid in bed to hopefully relieve my affliction**.** I heard a rush of soft voices come from downstairs and realised that the garden girl must have arrived. A quick thought entered my head- _should I make June happy-something I've wanted to achieve-by pretending I want to introduce myself to the girl so she can feel welcomed? _But then the memory of my recent conversation with the girl in class seeped into my head and I did not want to relive that situation. So I decided Alice can do all welcoming.

A knock on my door woke me up, I didn't even realise I fell asleep, how long has it been? I looked over to the window and saw it was still daytime, maybe I was just out for a few minutes. Alice walked in "sorry Edward I just wanted to make sure you were okay, are you?"

"What time is it Alice"

"It's nine o'clock Edward, are you okay?"

"In the morning?"

"Yes"

"Saturday morning?"

"Yes..."

"Man I've slept through yesterday afternoon and through the night"

"I'm sorry I didn't wake you up before but I didn't want to disturb you, is everything okay though?"

"Yeah, yeah Alice I'm fine". I kind of lied, the discomfort in my head still stalked me; maybe I was coming down with something.

"Okay, well that's good then, you don't look too good...but I'll believe you. Well a bit later I need to drop off the money to Bella, and I wanted to know if you wanted to come for the walk?"

"What about your friends?"

"Nah change of plans" she smiled.

"Oh, well thanks. Yeah okay I'll com- wait, who's Bella?

"The gardener, she came yesterday".

"Oh okay, yeah I'll come".

Alice was right I didn't look too good as the boy who stared back at me in the reflection of the mirror appeared unfamiliar. Light purple shadows hung under his eyes, which were tainted with red vessels. Arrays of his hair reached out in every direction with some strands hugging his pale face. I don't remember looking like that. I let the cool water run between my hands, the water slipped through the gaps of my fingers while I washed this face away. I took some headache tablets before I joined Alice outside.

"So where's her house?" I asked Alice, walking beside her on the footpath of our road.

"June said its house number nineteen. Have you seen our lawn?

"Mm not really, is it good?"

"Well it's really a bunch of dirt holes right now but she showed us the design and it's going to look beautiful once it's done. The girls really friendly too, I already got her phone number and we're going to organise a day out."

I started laughing in my head-ah that triggered the pain to go off- about Alice's eagerness to have so many friends, and how easy it was for her to achieve that. I hope the tablets start kicking in soon or I'm going to become a zombie.

I stood at the mailbox while Alice strode elegantly towards the number nineteen house. A middle aged man opened the door.

"Hi I'm Alice, is Bella here?"

"Oh sure I'll just get her for you, would you like to come in?"

"Thank you, but I'll just wait out here" Her head angled slightly towards where I stood as if I was the excuse for her not accepting the invitation. Wise decision Alice.

"That's fine, I'll go get her". He smiled and went back inside. From out of the silence loud thuds of footsteps came closer and closer until they stopped.

"Hey Bella, nice to see you again"

"Good to see you too Alice".

I wasn't really paying too much attention but from the corner of my eyes I saw them hug. I rolled my eyes softly in my head- Ow; not a good idea.

"Here's your money Bella, sorry, I'll make sure we have it on time next week. I was wondering if you'd like to spend the day with me and my brother?" My head shot up, why Alice doesn't consult me before she makes plans is beyond me. The girl must have noticed my movement and smiled at me so I had to smile back. My lips felt so dry and stiff from sleeping so much, but to be honest I felt like lying down some more.

"Thanks Alice, I'd love to but we're having some visitors coming, another day though yeah?"

"Alright definitely soon, see you at school Bella, bye"

"Bye Alice". The girl glanced back towards me with another smile, for some reason the muscles around my mouth just didn't have the energy to smile back so I just turned away, and waited for Alice to join me on the path again.

To my surprise the weekend went fast. I spent most of the time in my room working on homework and catching up on some reading, but the ache in my head stopped me from having a long attention span and stopped me from doing anything else besides lie on my bed.

I wasn't looking forward to Monday at school because I only expected it to be the same as last week. Alice tried making conversation with me as we walked to school but it was really hard to think straight with the throbbing irritation in my head and body. Alice seemed to give up half way. As we walked inside the school she left me, as she does everyday, to meet up with her friends. However, today she stopped down the hall and started talking to the girl who does our garden; the garden girl. Alice turn towards my direction and waved, the girl looked at Alice and then before her eyes could reach me I walked away down the hall to class. I wasn't in the mood for any of Alice's games, she doesn't always have to mention me to her friends, there's nothing interesting about me unless they ask why her brother is so weird and then she feels obliged to give them some explanation but hopefully not the true one.

For some reason I had an inkling that nothing would be going my way this week as the garden girl walked into English, eyes locked at where I sat at the back and started walking towards me. Great not another conversation...

She sat down besides me and started getting ready for class. "So your Edward right? Alice's brother" They all knew Alice first; let me guess, this one also feels rude for talking about me but not knowing me. I rolled my eyes in my head- ouch; I have to remind myself not to do that.

"Yeah I am, and your Bella, is that short for Irena?"

"Um no it's short for Isabella"

"Oh, June's memory she's old you can't blame her for getting names wrong".

She softly laughed "She's really nice I hope she likes my design for the garden".

"Well she _is _constantly looking at your design plans, but maybe it's not a look of awe" I sarcastically said. She didn't seem to find it rude or anything, she just smiled and continued. "Hm, well I suppose you won't be seeing me at your house anymore".

"Why's that?"

"Because I'll be fired" A slight smile appeared on her face. She's actually continuing my joke, that's a first.

The teacher started talking, and instead of continuing the chatter, she concentrated and did everything that was asked of us without speaking another word until the teacher stopped.

"So Edward, did you want to sit with me and my friends today? I can't guarantee they're the best of company but they're all special in their own way".

"Oh ah thanks but I already promised some other people, thanks anyway".

"Okay well the options always there if you change your mind, I was looking forward to having a normal person around, but I understand, I'd say no too if I was you." I didn't really know what to say; this girl didn't hold conversations like the girl last Friday. And in my head I was too busy working out whether she was being sarcastic about calling me normal or speaking the truth. The last time she spoke in that class was when we said bye. I quickly saw Peter, the boy who smiled at me on my first day.

"Hey Peter"

"Oh Hi Edward..."

"Hey is it alright if I sit with you and your friend's today?"

"Yeah for sure pal, we'll be at the back of the cafeteria on the left side, alright cool?"

"Ah yeah okay thanks, see you there."

I saw Peter and his Friends sitting coolly at the back as if they all were listening to some chill out music, yet no music played in their ears. Peter introduced me to all his friends; a mixture of faces looked my way, boys with dreadlocks, boys whose hair were all shaven displaying tattoos cemented on their scalps, and only a few girls who probably wanted to be boys. They all seemed very relaxed and didn't seem bothered by my presence; I eased up a little from their good reaction. Across from us, a few tables away, I saw the garden girl looking at me. Thank god I asked Peter or else my dishonesty would have been caught out. I paused for a moment before I turned away unsure whether she just smiled at me, but before I responded I quickly flicked my head to a guy sitting next to me with green spiky hair, and asked him a question so it wouldn't appear that I was ignoring her, but that I was busy with a conversation. I asked if he's always lived in Forks.

"Ah yeah, yeah I have" he kept nodding his head slowly as if he was in some trance. That's exactly the response I was looking for, something that made it out as if we were having some deep meaningful discussion. I would not be surprised if it was Alice's idea for this girl to keep an eye on me.

**Thanks for reading! I hope you've enjoyed the current chapter and will be interested to read the next one. **

**Kath :)**


	4. Chapter 4 Seeing The Hidden

**Hey all! Well like all of the chapters I hope you enjoy chapter4, and will be excited to read what happens next, and don't be shy to leave some feedback...**

**Enjoy!**

EPOV

**Chapter 4- Seeing The Hidden**

I felt suspicious eyes coming from both June and Alice during Monday nights dinner. It was too quite and I knew June didn't like silence, so something was definitely wrong. All of a sudden my breathing grew heavier and the room began to swim around me in a blur. Was I hyperventilating? Each breath became shorter until the feeling was like needles stabbing at my chest. I thought I was going to black out but then June put her hand on mine, and the breathing became regular again.

"Edward dear, are you okay?"

I opened my eyes, relief swooped in as the room stood still as it should. They frowned at me in confusion, waiting for a reply. I slid my hand out from June's tired skin.

"Yes I'm fine. You've both been looking at me lately as if you're expecting me to turn into a werewolf or something, what have I done?" I knew that was an idiotic question; yes of course they would have a worried look now because I almost fainted, but they've acted like this for the pass two days and I'm just frustrated that I'm not getting any answers.

June and Alice slipped a glance towards each other. Alice looked down at her plate. I could feel a hot rush of anger drive through my body; this did not contribute well to the familiar pain that's stood by me these few days.

"Okay that's it; if no one's going to talk I'm leaving" I stood up from the table and started walking towards the door.

"Please Edward wait! We'll talk okay just don't go" Alice pleaded; there was no sign of her boisterous self she now just wore a blank serious face.

"I won't be long" I slammed the door after me.

The fresh night air felt good against my body that was both warm inside and out. The lack of street lights made our road very dark to walk along. I didn't want my thoughts to be on what happened I just wanted to walk and not think of anything, hard to do but I tried. I heard faint voices coming from a house; I looked up from the path and saw that the garden girl was out her door talking to some boy. Hopefully the dark would blind her eyesight from where I walked. I turned around and headed back towards home prepared to go to bed.

Alice and I were quite on the way to school the next day. That morning at breakfast June was silent as well. I wondered if they did that for me or if they were hurt by my actions. I just shrugged the thought away; it didn't matter much to me now, nothing else was important but to somehow stop the unknown torture which occurred in my head and body. I was beginning to notice a pattern with each day; each day was a thread that seemed forever stretching, and I wondered when it was going to snap; when will the long tormenting days get better for me? Will they end?

In history that girl sat next to me again bopping her way down to the seat. I just felt like pushing all the tables and seats around me and say _oh pity, seems like you just have to sit somewhere else._ My eyebrows rose in surprise at that thought; I don't know where it came from.

"Hi Edward, how are you today?"

"Better before"

She didn't know whether to laugh or get my hint and move. Unfortunately she stayed.

"Bella told me she asked you to sit with us yesterday. I promise that my friend's don't bite"

I rolled my eyes; this time not in my head. "Mm I wouldn't focus on your friend's they're not the reason". The thought of what I just said never came to my mind, it just automatically swirled out from my tongue and now out into the air. Her mouth froze opened and fortunately this time she moved away.

At lunch I sat with Peter and his friends. I never felt pressured to talk with them, most of the time I sat silently, and besides when they talked to each other it was a mumble so I'm sure they won't be offended by my lack of communication. I started fidgeting because I felt like I had eyes on me; I looked around and saw Alice. I was right; she was looking at me whilst laughing with her friends, her laughter was different, it was not genuine because she was too busy worrying about me. Was I that fragile? Did she expect me to fall at any moment and break into a thousand pieces? Was she right? Just when I thought Alice was the only one looking at me I saw the garden girl and the girl from history looking my way. The history girl had a real sour look on her face, whereas the other one was laughing from behind her hands. They continued to stare so I slumped my head down on the table. This is going to be a long week I thought to myself.

At English- my last subject for the day- I saw the garden girl walk in. I rolled my eyes; great now she's going to sit with me again. Yes I was wrong. I'm sure her friends at the front would prefer her company. Well this was more like it I wish every day could be like this; no conversations just silence. I was hardly paying attention in class that I was surprised when it ended and everyone started walking out of the classroom. The end of the day finally here. I was one of the last to walk out.

"Um Edward?" a voice spoke behind me. I turned to see it was the garden girl. Was she waiting outside of the class for me? I raised my eyebrows for her to continue.

"Well I know you don't feel like talking but I wanted to ask you something if that's okay?"

"Can this wait till another day like next week or perhaps never?" My coldness kept startling me but I never felt bad for it, not lately. She didn't flinch back and her facial expression didn't change like it did on the other girl. I started walking outside to meet Alice at the gate, though I'm sure she would have loved to walk without me; being with me or alone made no difference there was still emptiness.

The girl caught up with me and pulled at my shirt making me face her.

"Look, I know there's something wrong with you and I wish I could help but I can't when you keep turning your back on me".

"I never asked for your help and I'll never ask for it so if you want a career as a counsellor then practice on somebody else". She kept walking by my side. Alice, now only steps away, stared at us curiously.

"Okay then I don't need to help you, but I wanted to ask if you and Alice wanted to come over on Saturday?"

"Aw what a shame I'm busy but I'm sure Alice would love to be in your precious company and then you can test your counselling skills on her too, make an evening out of it. In fact why don't you ask Alice right now?" I pointed towards Alice as we reached her and then I walked pass both of them. I heard them softly talk. My feet would not stop and wait for my sister; they kept pushing me further until I was home.

In science the next day the garden girl sat next to me with a big smile. I wore the opposite expression.

"You hate this don't you?" I didn't answer. "You hate when people sit next to you I can tell"

"So what are you doing, trying to make my day better?"

"You know Alice said she'll be coming on the weekend and said that she's going to make you come, I know you're not busy".

"Mm because you already know me so well that let me guess, you've cleverly come up with the conclusion that I follow Alice and obey her commands?"

"Well no its not like that, but Edward if you stay miserable like this all the time and find nothing to get your mind off whatever it is bothering you then your going to forever be unhappy". Nothings bothering me expect for you, I thought in my head.

"And why do you care whether I'm miserable or happy?" I said to her.

The teacher cut in our conversation "Bella, Edward, is there something you'd like to share with us?"

"No" we both said in unison and he got back to teaching the class.

She now whispered, her head bent down towards the table, and closer to mine "I'm a counsellor remember, I have to care about my patients".

I whispered back to her "you know I wish I didn't have to hear your voice for one day, or better a yet a whole year. But I don't think you could control yourself".

"Hey it sounds fine to me"

"Yeah? Then you can't speak to me for the whole year okay?"

"It's a deal". She straightened herself back in the seat and began her work.

"I'm going to Bella's house on Saturday Edward and I think you should come." Alice gave me a serious look while we ate our dinner, breaking the silence which often existed these nights.

"I think she's right dear" June said, choosing her words carefully probably cautious of me snapping.

"She's annoying and intrusive I don't want to spend my day near her anymore, she's worst enough at school".

"Edward, she's only trying to be nice" Alice said smiling now.

I shook my head "Look, I'll think about it but let me make up my own mind okay, no more talking about it until Saturday and if I decide not to go I don't want to hear any complaints". I don't know why June and Alice smiled, I never said I promised, I was simply letting them hear what they wanted; candy to their ears.

Thursday at school went fast because no one wanted to speak to me and I didn't want to speak to them. Was the thread beginning to break away? That night however I began feeling ill. I broke into a sweat even though the temperature felt like ice, so on Friday I decided to stay home. It felt like June didn't even exist because she never once tried convincing me to get up from my bed, I think she realised I had to be alone. I decided it was time for some fresh Forks air since I was becoming stale from being locked up in the house. Instead of walking along our road I went up to the forests opening. Even though it has only been two weeks since the move, the forest already appeared different. It looked more tangled together; the branches twining in with each other in a weaving pattern. The air smelt clear and sweet as the wind brushed up against the trees and flowed passed me. It called me in. The light from the sky could barely sneak pass the heavy leaves and branches, so it was very dark inside. There was no real path but it was easy to walk around the large trees that hovered over me. I came upon this amazing spot; a smooth tree stood perfectly alone, no other trees surrounded it just bright green grass, the tree scintillated from the skies light as it reflected upon it. I sat down and leaned my back against the tree enjoying the peacefulness it induced. Absentmindedly, I carved my name into the tree and wondered if in a few years later my name would still exist on it. In order to beat Alice and the garden girl home I started making my way back. Once I was in bed again I heard them enter the house; I'm glad we made that bet and I'm glad I felt sick so I could stay in here.

"So are you coming Edward" Alice said over breakfast. The ache has not decreased and I wasn't too keen to be in the company of others. However...there was that bet so it would be funny to see how the garden girl holds up not speaking to me. I looked up at June's and Alice's stare, from the way their eyes glued sternly on me I expected that if I said no, laser beams would shoot out and burn me. This was my chance to make them happy, and I suppose if I didn't enjoy myself I could go back home. I forced myself, even though my mind kept chanting_ no, no, no, no, no-_

"Yes, okay."

When we got there her parents both welcomed us. The girl showed us around and then we ate some lunch and had some drinks in the backyard. So far she has not spoken a word to me- barley glanced at me- so she and Alice talked while the father kept asking me questions about my drawings and art equipment. I wish Alice would control her tongue next time.

"Have you ever entered any art competitions Edward?" the father asked me

"Yeah, when I was younger but I haven't in a while"

"Well if you're interested Forks holds one every month on the same date, actually today". He laughed regimentally.

"Oh, what's the date today?" From the corner of my eyes I saw Alice's head snap towards me; what's her problem...

"The 18th, so on the 18th of every month you can go to the-son? Are you okay?"

I couldn't hear voices anymore- usually this made me happy- but right now I was afraid and wanted to hear the outside world. Faces of fear and uncertainty came to my view, their lips were moving but I was in no state to lip read. The rush of blood in my ears was the only sound I could hear besides from the rapid beats of my heart, every beat so clear. Hands touched my arms. I looked around and saw Alice, her eyes wide but not fearful, I wondered what was happening to me. A wave of fire lit inside of me, it grew so warm that it felt like my insides were going to melt. Was I dieing? My brain began to race around in a hurry for something...for some memory that was hidden; and then it traced what it was looking for. The sight of the memory played in my head. I remembered. I tried to fight it, but reality won over me. And I realised why I had been in so much pain these two weeks, and why my family was overly concerned over me.

"I have to go" I blurted out not sure whether it came out in a slur, and I ran as fast as I could home. I didn't care what they thought. My brain was numb but I just knew that I had to go back home. I ran up into the bathroom and tried ceasing the burning by splashing cold water on my face. Running in after me was June and Alice. There was no improvement to the temperature that boiled in my body. I began having trouble breathing just like the other night. I nearly hit my head on the sink as I loss control of my body. Alice helped me on the floor tears running down her face and she tried to talk to me and even though I could finally hear her I couldn't seem to move my mouth to answer her. Then with no control on my half my mouth opened, my stomach tensed inwards and I began vomiting. Alice continued to be by my side. The nausea ceased but I still felt horrible inside. My sight started becoming distorted and I was not quite sure whether it was because of the water I had splashed on my face or tears streaming down. Through this cloudy vision I saw unfamiliar eyes watching from the door. Who was it? Then as I blinked a few times; it was the garden girl, she must have ran after Alice. Everyone's face wore an expression of sympathy besides the garden girl whose face was frozen in shock. My eyes began growing heavy as I leaned on the toilet bowl. June brought a pillow for my head to rest on and I saw Alice move with the girl out into the hall. This mess will all be over soon I thought to myself as each blink brought me closer to sleep. My eyes finally shut- I was slowly slipping- but from outside I heard the girl speak something, and before all noise became completely vacant I heard Alice's voice "it's the day our parent's were murdered". And then I blacked out.

**Thanks for reading!**

**Kath :)**


	5. Chapter 5 Feeling Better

**Finally chapter 5 is up, I hope it's enjoyable. Have a good read!**

EPOV

I could hardly recall everything which happened on Saturday. I knew why it happened though; because feelings and memories which you try oppress will eventually come up and strike you and hurt you even more. And it did, it hurt. The memory of my parent's murder was as strong as it was the day I witnessed it. I could smell their blood, and the smell of murder lingered in the air. Thankfully though, the pain was beginning to soothe. This is when I realised the garden girl was right; I needed to confront what I was trying to hide because now that it's out I feel better. I think the thread is beginning to fray.

June and Alice felt positive that this time I was going to remain happy, that the person the murder made me would be gone forever now. She didn't call any doctors this time. But just like the other times I knew this happy season would pass and my Mr. Hyde would return. I wish I was as optimistic as they were. But instead of waiting for this freedom to end I instead decided to soak up this feeling for as long as it lasted, which I felt was not going to be very long.

Alice still didn't feel comfortable leaving me alone, so for the whole week she missed school. But I did really feel better compared to how I felt last week. It was like a whole lot of weight had been lifted off from my shoulders. The house began looking a lot brighter than it had been since we've moved into Forks. I think Alice and June were beginning to notice the subtle difference of my mood because I could actually attempt more conversations and hold them for longer. That felt like a change to me, even if it wasn't the biggest of changes. It was a slow process.

On Monday morning Alice and June kept staring at me, not in a worried way but this time with big smiles. Was June that happy that me and Alice were going back to school giving her time alone, and did Alice miss her friends that much?

"Edward are you ready to leave now"? Alice said in an impatient voice. She was bopping as she held the front door handle tightly. My eyes moved to June who stood subtly next to her.

"And I thought I had problems. What's wrong Alice". She rolled her eyes.

"Nothing! Now let's hurry up and go to school".

I rolled my eyes back to her and shrugged as I followed her lead outside. My eyes straight away opened in shock. Parked in our driveway was a brand new silver Volvo.

"Surprise!" Alice and June said in unison.

I couldn't think of anything to say I was sincerely speechless. "What..." I managed to say, the shock of sound in my voice made them realise what I meant.

"Dear, I know it has been a long time, but Alice and I both thought you were ready to drive now. If you don't feel comfortable you can start off slowly". I turned to June, "thank you so much, use didn't have to".

"So that means you like it" Alice chirped.

I smiled now looking at both of them "It's more than enough.". Alice handed the keys to me, but I just couldn't take it from her hand. After the snappy mood swings and this is how I get repaid I did not deserve it. So I thought to myself that I'll only take it once I feel like I've deserved it. "I love it, but I want to drive it when I'm ready, just a personal goal I want to achieve if use won't get offended?". June nodded and Alice put the keys in the house.

During school at lunch I started day dreaming about driving to school and around Forks in my new car. I forgot how it felt like to drive but I was excited to start again then I could make trips to La Push all the kids talk about its beautiful scenery. I needed to both feel mentally and physically free.

"Ah, hey Edward, why the big smile on your face?" The garden girl interrupted my day dream. She bit her lip and I could tell she was nervous to speak to me since the last time she saw me was _that _Saturday. I began shaking my head at her. She was perplexed as she didn't understand what I was doing. Silly girl she's already forgotten.

"I knew you couldn't control yourself".

"Opps". She put her hands to her lips realising that she spoke to me breaking the promise we made one day at school. Lines appeared on her forehead as she frowned in anger and before she turned away she squinted at me as if she was saying _I'll get you back. _

When school was finished the sky was completely covered in an army of grey clouds and the rain poured wildly.

"Edward!" Alice tried to scream on top of the rain's roar. "I'm catching a ride with Lisa, come with us". I popped my black umbrella open "thanks, but I'm just going to walk".

"Are you sure?".

"Yep I'm sure, see you at home".

I was walking along the schools road when I heard a beep and a navy blue car pulled up near me. It was hard to see inside because of the tinted windows so I stood waiting for something to happen. The windows finally wounded down and a familiar head stared at me from the driver's seat.

"Are you crazy? Jump in I'll take you home."

"I'm fine walking, thanks anyway"

She rolled her eyes "I've already broke the promise and yes I can't control myself, happy?. Now will you get in?"

I half smiled at her confession "fine, fine". I bet she wouldn't have left until I said yes and I didn't want her to get annoying again.

Her car was crispy warm and then I realised that she had leather seats and my back was wet. I hope it doesn't ruin it or anything. She was looking at me from the corner of her eyes and I knew she was going to speak soon.

"How are you Edward" she emphasised each word so I knew she was asking me about how I was from Saturday.

"I'm fine, honestly." I didn't look at her but kept my eyes on outside.

"Well I have lots of questions but it's not my business to ask". She looked at me and smiled.

"I saw a car in the driveway this morning, whose is it?" she said

"Oh that's mine, June and Alice bought it for me."

"Why aren't you driving it?"

"Don't worry it's a boring story"

"I won't get bored and if I do I'll let you know deal?"

"Alright well-"

"Bored" she started laughing crazily trying to hold it in "I-I'm sorry, please continue"

I couldn't help but chuckle with her, maybe we were being stupid but it felt good to laugh.

"Like I was saying...I'm sort of setting out a personal goal; once I feel like I've deserved to accept their gift, then I'll drive it."

"Okay, well I think I understand, even if I don't I'm sure you can explain one day". She smiled at me again. She better be known for driving without looking at the road because I don't want to make the population of Forks smaller than it already is.

She stopped at our drive way.

"Well thanks for the lift".

"That's fine, but don't expect me to rescue you all the time from the rain". That's the third time she smiled at me.

"Don't worry, I won't be waiting".

"Cya Edward".

"Cya Bella".

Bella lied though. The following day, and the rest of the week was raining and the passenger door to her car was opened for me. I had no problem taking Bella's invitation since it outweighed the option of being stuck with Alice and her friend in the car talking about clothes non stop, plus Bella wouldn't give me the chance to say no.

"You know Jessica has been talking about you again, she doesn't care about rejection she'll strike again". Great I wish Bella didn't mention this girl, I didn't want to keep hurting people.

"Can you please tell her not to bother me".

"What am I suppose to say?"

"Your creative garden girl, think something up, she seems the type to believe anything".

"And is that your type?" She wasn't really looking at me and she wasn't looking at the road either, just somewhere into the distance it looked like.

"You're getting a bit personal don't yo-BELLA!" My hands went over her hands which held the steering wheel and I turned us back onto the lane. "Bella you nearly had us killed what were you doing?"

"I-I'm s-sorry I didn't realise-"

"Realise that you were about to kill us?!" I finished her sentence off, probably not exactly what she was going to say. She was shaking a little with hands clenched tight on the wheel and eyes concentrating on the road finally. I let myself cool down. "Sorry Bella, I got scared that's all". She half smiled but I could tell she was still shaken up. We arrived at my house, and since it was Friday Bella came for the garden.

June let us into the house and said sweetly to Bella "Honey I wouldn't want you to catch a cold, the garden can wait till next week".

"Oh well okay if you insist June, I'll see you guys at school then".

"No Bella stay, stay! It's Friday night, sleepover please..." Alice said to Bella with the most pleading eyes Alice could ever give. Man did she get her way easily.

Bella bit her lip while she thought about it. "Okay then, I'll get my things and come back".

When Bella came back Alice straight away pulled at her "Come on, let me try some make up styles on you, you never wear anything on your face". Bella didn't look too happy with that idea.

"Alice...please don't torture me"

"Aw Bella please, please" Alice tried her pleading way again.

"Well alright…you're never going to let me say no".

While Alice tortured Bella upstairs I helped June rearrange the furniture, June took advantage at the fact that I feel okay being in the company of others.

Before Alice could hold Bella as hostage dinner was ready. It was really awaked having another person there because the table was so small that we were all nearly touching elbows. It wasn't as quiet as usual, Alice was letting Bella in on how she'll turn out, June was laughing at Alices excitement and reminded her to organise the graduation party for the end of the year.

"Oh yeah! Oh Bella you have to be there it's going to look beautiful!" Alice nearly jumped out of her seat.

"Um I'm not really a partying type; the whole dancing scene isn't my thing"

"Well that's okay you can still come and hang around with the boring people like Edward who don't dance or talk". I winced at her while I tried not to rub my elbows against Bella's and Alice's. From upstairs Alice's laughter could be heard and Bella's groans of annoyance.

"They're getting along well" June said with a little laugh.

"Yeah Alice loves her new doll to play with".

"She's a lovely girl isn't she?".

"Um she's nice" I couldn't think of anything else to say about her.

When I went to bed I could still hear Alice and Bella, I was sure glad I wasn't a females who was friends with Alice. At one o'clock in the morning I got up to go to the toilet but as I opened my door I heard a bang come from up ahead. The hallway was dark so I made my way slowly to where the noise was.

"Bella?". I could see her figure from the dark and she seemed lost.

"Damn Edward you scared me!". She looked inside the door she just opened. "Opps, this isn't the toilet I suppose then".

"Well no, it's the closet Bella, the toilet is the next door down". I saw her white set of teeth shine from the dark.

"What are you doing anyway" she said before she entered the bathroom.

I rolled my eyes "I need to use the bathroom too".

"Oh, I'll be quick".

When I came out of the bathroom Bella was outside of the door. "Have you lost your way back to Alice's room?"

"No, I was thinking that I haven't seen your room before".

"It's one in the morning Bella".

"And? I'm not tired".

I shrugged and she followed me into my room.

"See it's a room, nothing else" I said as I let her in.

"Ooh can I see your drawings Alice always talks about them, please..." Man Alice was starting to rub off on her.

"Fine..." I got out my drawing folder and handed it to her. She took it from me eagerly and sat on my bed, saying ohh and ahh as she flipped through the sleeves.

"Wow, this one is especially good Edward, it looks exactly like her". I sat down beside her and saw that the picture she was talking about was the one of June which I drew four years ago. Already in a matter of those few years changes in Junes face were present.

"You're really good Edward, don't give it up. Hey you reckon you could do my portrait one day?" She turned her head swiftly to me nearly banging her head against mine, I moved back.

"Sure Bella, now go to bed I'm tired." She wanted me to draw her? She was probably still dazed with sleep.

"Okay, but you promise?"

"Yes I promise". She got up and headed towards the door.

"Goodnight Edward"

"Goodnight Bella" and she left.

That night I had a dream that I was driving on a rainy road. My lane was empty but the opposite lane was busy. I was concentrating hard trying to see out the windows, my rain wipers wouldn't work in the car, yet I was speeding. Then I began loosing control of the car and the car was swerving left and right, my hands tried to control the stirring wheel but it was failing. Just before my car hit another a pair of hands touched mine on the wheel and controlled the car to safety. The hands were a nice soft warm that made my stomach feel uneasy but not in a bad way. My blood rushed to my cheeks as they blushed. I began feeling soft inside. I looked down at the hands, and they didn't look like June's frail hands, this person was young soft peach colour which had no lines to define her age. They felt a little familiar, I couldn't get my eyes off them, couldn't get my mind off their feeling. And then the person who owned those hands called my name. I turned to see it was Bella. My heart skipped a beat and I woke up. I shuffled around in the bed trying to get that feeling inside of me away, and with some luck I drifted back into a dreamless sleep.

**Thanks so much for reading. I'm sorry if it's a little slow but I wanted people to really understand the sort of depression Edward felt so then the impact Bella makes is noticeable. A lot more fun and better things will happen shortly. Also Bella's point of view will come up after a few more chapters. **

**If you liked it, have any suggestions, or any advice on how it can improve please review it'll be greatly appreciated.**

**Next chapter: Edward and Bella get to know each other more and Bella's family tries to set her up with some other boy. **

**Kath :)**


	6. Chapter 6 Uncomfortable Self

**Hey all! Hope you enjoy this chapter!**

EPOV

**Chapter 6- Uncomfortable Self**

The next morning a chirpy voice began annoying my ears. I opened my eyes to find that Alice was at my bedroom door calling my name out along with some weird names like orange boy and mandarin boy, man was she confusing me.

"Why are you waking me up Alice?"

"Because oompa loompa boy we're all going to the movies!"

"Whose we?". I had forgotten that Bella stayed over and only remembered when Alice moved a side from the door pointing to where Bella stood behind her who seemed to be blushing.

"So get up get up Edward!" Alice jumped around, man who has this much energy in the morning?

"Alright I'll get up if I can get some privacy please?" I didn't want to get out from the blankets just in my boxer shorts with Bella there especially.

"Mm yeah you _should_ get changed" Alice said as she closed my door.

I went to pull the blankets off from me and... opps! To my horror my blankets weren't even on my body and my bright orange boxers were in full view. Well that explains a lot...

Bella insisted on driving us to the movies and I felt a pang of regret when Alice and I agreed, as a flashback shot through my head from the day before when she nearly had an accident. I made sure my seat belt was on tight as I sat in the back to allow Bella and Alice to talk amongst each other. During the ride I kept a constant lookout on where Bella's eyes were through the rear view mirror where her face was in plain view. When I wasn't guarding her eyes my attention was to her hands which I was happy to see that they held the steering wheel tightly. I was surprised at her concentration whilst Alice chewed her ear off.

"Bella I don't know why you wore those jeans, my denim skirt would have fit you perfectly" Alice sighed disapprovingly to Bella.

"I'm comfy in this, I want to be able to stretch and stuff at the movies instead of having to have my legs closed together if I wore a skirt". Bella was definitely the opposite of my sister, if Alice didn't have a new outfit every week she began feeling ugly. The damn media feeding her crap, appearance doesn't make you pretty but poor Alice believed them, at least Bella seemed like she was fighting against the norm.

"And another thing blue suits you better than red". Bella rolled her eyes at Alice's comment.

"Maybe you should just leave Bella alone Alice at least for a few minutes okay?"

"Thanks" Bella smiled at me through the rear view mirror. I thought I better help us all out because if Bella gets frustrated and loses control of that wheel we're all in trouble.

"And why are you defending her Edward hm?" Alice turned her head at me and gave me a suspicious look.

I replied with the truth, "So we're not in an accident". Bella now gave me a death stare through the mirror and Alice just turned around looking confused.

Bella and I tried hard against Alice's choice of a romantic movie but we just couldn't fight all the power she held in that little body of hers. We both groaned in the seats because Alice was telling us the plot and it just sounded too cliché.

"Well Alice, now I will have something in common with every girl at our school, all they do is talk about how romantic and good looking the main guy is". Bella rolled her eyes while she chewed on some popcorn.

"Trust me guys, it'll be a great movie"

"Well since you paid Alice, I'm happy". I said taking a hand full of popcorn which Alice held.

"Hey Bella I'm going to the bathroom before it starts, did you need to go?"

"Nah I'm fine thanks"

"Okay then I'll be back, mine my seat guys" Alice jumped out from her seat leaving the popcorn on her seat in between Bella and I, and she rushed out of the cinema.

"Your sister she's..."

"Something?" I finished Bella's sentence.

"Yep. She has so much energy, does she ever get tired?"

"Nope, she's like an everlasting energiser bunny". I went to grab some more popcorn but accidentally bumped my hands into Bella's who was going for the same thing.

"Sorry" we both said in unison.

"Ladies first" I said allowing her to take some popcorn.

"Wow the movie hasn't even started and you've already become quite the gentlemen". I laughed and winked at her. Yeah I really haven't felt like a gentleman in awhile since my parent's death but maybe it'll come back to me naturally I thought to myself.

"Gee Bella you look sorta sweated up are you okay" Alice jumped back into her seat.

"Oh yeah it's just quite hot in hear that's all".

"You sure you're feeling okay, we can leave?"

"I'm fine thanks Alice; you know I wouldn't want to miss the movie". Just as Bella said this the lights dimmed and ads began rolling.

Just like Bella I couldn't wait till the movie ended. So when the movie did finish I breathed an air of relief. Alice was the only one who had tears masking her face.

"Um are you okay Alice?" I said in concern.

"Yep just give me a second" She patted her tears away, "didn't you guys find it so sad?"

"Yeah sure it was sad but kind of stupid too I mean he dies and she wants to then die after him, it was kind of weird..."

"It's called love Bella, something you obviously haven't felt". She teased.

Bella laughed "and you have hm?"

"Hey ladies can we please continue the argument some place else I need to stretch already".

Bella and I waited outside of the car while Alice went into the bathroom again. It was pretty quiet and it seemed like someone should talk but I couldn't think of what to say. I started tracing my fingers on my black jeans hoping that a spark of creativity would come up and I would have something to talk about, man I probably seemed like such a boring person. I just didn't exactly feel like myself around Bella yet.

"Look your best friend" Bella finally spoke and I turned my attention towards what she was looking at. Making eye contact with me and Bella was Jessica and some of her friends.

"Quickly jump in the car and lets go" I joked around knowing that they were already walking towards us, I wished Alice would hurry up.

"Hey Bella, hey Edward!". She stood close by in between us. We both said hi and I could tell Bella had the same attitude as me with her presence.

"So what are you two doing together". I didn't like her sort of tone it sounded suspicious.

"We watched a movie". Bella's short answer was obvious to me that she didn't want Jessica around so it must be because she doesn't really like her. When Bella had said this Jessica's eyebrows raised and her eyes switched from Bella to me, back and forth. "With Edward's sister Alice" Bella continued making whatever idea Jessica had in her head disappear.

"Oh okay then." Her eyebrows lowered and she smiled. "Well did you three want to join us, we're going to grab some food?" She just kept looking at me when she said this so I felt I had to answer her.

My mind was trying to find some excuse "um ah"

"We promised Edward's grandma some favours, sorry maybe next time" Ah thank god Bella saved me. Jessica still looked at me even when Bella spoke to her, and she looked very disappointed so she quickly said bye and left with her group of friends who chatted away sounding like seagulls all pecking for the one fish; yep it was very loud and annoying.

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"How was the movie?" June questioned who started getting dinners ingredients out.

"Oh it was so so good!" Alice said. Bella and I looked at each other rolling our eyes.

"I'd rather watch a dog eat its food" I joked softly pushing Alice. All three of them laughed. Everything seemed really comforting at that moment and I was glad to be me right now.

June finally let me help her cook dinner after much pestering from my side. I actually enjoyed cooking a lot and it was something which June and I did quite a lot together before my life shattered into pieces. We worked as a team; we'd pass the ingredients, we'd ask each other's opinion whether more salt could be added or parsley.

"Well you certainly haven't lost your touch with this lasagne" Alice said smiling at me as I brought out the golden crisp lasagne we just made from out of the oven.

Just as June called for Alice and Bella, while I set the table up, Alice came running down the stairs bopping happily while stating "woo hoo I got her to stay another night!"

While the four of us ate dinner I felt a little sorry for Bella because she seemed a little uncomfortable about staying again as if she felt she was a nuisance. But since she's been here Alice has been so much happier and June's smile has not erased at all. I wish I could tell her this just so she could be more herself like she is in the car with me, when she's over she seems a little uncomfortable around me but I suppose I don't help either being all quiet and boring. Man, I really need to stop worrying about what others will think of me and just be myself.

After dinner Alice took me and Bella into her room saying that she had a really good idea. I reluctantly followed uneasy about Alice's crazy suggestions; hopefully she wouldn't make me as a Ken and dress me up like she does to Bella. But I had no other better company.

"Alright guys its time to play...Twister!" I think my jaw dropped down when Alice got the game out, that was a shock.

"Man Alice we haven't played that in years..."

"Yeah and didn't we have so much fun with it! Come on lets play you two up for it". I shrugged and Bella said that we should give it a go because she never played before which Alice was really shocked at.

"Yeah my parents thought it was a stupid and uneducated game for me to play so yeah never got the twister experience". Bella said shrugging as Alice set out the colourful mat and the twister.

Alice went first and had to put her left hand on a green circle. Bella followed next and had to put her left foot on a yellow circle. They were already laughing so much that I ended up laughing with them and we weren't even twisted yet! I had to put my right arm on a green circle, taking the furthest circle from the girls so we wouldn't all fall together. After a few spins of the twister Alice was nearly doing the splits in front of me with her hands over Bella's legs whose hands were over my hands while my legs had to somehow go under one of Alice's legs and one of Bella's arms. We were in hysterics with laughter. We were all trying so hard to stop from shaking but the laughter was uncontrollable and we all ended up falling onto each other rolling on the floor holding our stomachs.

"Oh my...god Alice are your...your legs okay" Bella managed to spit out through her fits full of laughter.

"I never knew I was that flexible, Twister really shows your true potential". Alice replied back rubbing her legs as we all calmed down sitting on the floor.

"And how tempting it was to push you forward Edward when I was behind you, you were so about to fall it's not funny".

"Oh really...well Bella Swan I knew I couldn't trust you behind me, don't worry I'll remember that one in the next game you better watch out."

As we attempted the game again straight away when Bella was in a vulnerable position I pushed her foot gently and she tumbled over Alice who ended up falling with her.

"Haha I'm the winner!" I said proudly as the girls were laughing on the floor saying sorry to each other.

"I'm so sorry Alice, I shouldn't be playing I am so clumsy". Silly Bella thought it was her fault that she fell; this made me fall to the floor and laugh even more. During the night I never confessed at what I did during Twister the thought of having her think it was her fault seemed much funnier.

Laughing so hard from all the games we played made me very tired so I was very relieved when I was finally in bed. I tried to remember the dream I had the other night, knowing that it made me feel weird, but the dream was totally gone from my memory. Before I fell asleep I made sure the blanket was wrapped around me securely in case a visitor decided to pop in tomorrow morning.

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please let me know what you think about the story so far...**

**More will happen where Edward will be more himself and more comfortable around Bella.**

**Kath :) **


	7. Chapter 7 Knocking On The Door

**Hey, hope you enjoy this chapter; it's getting really exciting for me to write since so much is going to happen soon. I hope it's good for you all to read too!**

**Chapter 7- Knocking On The Door**

"Good morning all" I said getting my breakfast ready, June, Alice, and Bella were already eating.

"Wow Edward what's with the huge smile on your face?" Alice didn't look curiously at me but happily as if she was glad I was like this, I must admit I did feel really good but I didn't really have an exact reason why. I suppose I've just really enjoyed the weekend because I haven't spent this much time with people for ages.

"Oh just happy to see your beautiful face Alice" I teased.

"Talking about beautiful, Bella and I are going shopping would you like to come Edward?". I looked at Bella surprised that she actually would want to go shopping with my crazy shopaholic sister.

"Hey don't look at me like that, she forced me!" Bella retorted.

"Mm I thought so. But yeah thanks Alice but no thanks, I think I'll just catch up on some school work".

"Alright suit yourself. Come on Bella lets get ready". Alice pulled Bella up from the table even though they were both in the middle of eating. June and I shot a glance at each other shaking our heads and laughing.

"How did I get a sister like that?" I asked June as I sat next to her to eat.

"Well your mum was a bit like her when she was this age too. It was so hard to control her she would just always get her way, but maybe when Alice is older she won't be so…excited or something anymore, but I don't see why she would want to be any different from how she is, she's always so happy and bubbly".

June was right Alice was the best sister anyone could ask for. She was always cheerful, always helpful and was always there when you needed her. I did want to spend some more time with her today but I could not stand being the bags holder at the shops.

After breakfast I hopped into the shower. I still couldn't wipe the smile off my face, to be able to talk to June about my mum, and to spend time with my sister was a great relief for me something I wanted to do for a while now. I finished my shower and wrapped the towel around my waist before I stepped out to change in my bedroom.

"Hey Edward!" Bella yelled out running from out of Alice's room. "Sorry but please please wont you come with us, how can I survive being alone with her".

I cracked up laughing at Bella "so you want me to be driven crazy just for your sake?"

She bit her lip and looked away "well…yeah…will you?" Her eyes shot up at me with such a pleading look and kept them on my eyes.

"I'm really sorry but she's all yours today. Have fun Bella bye…don't wait up for me, don't miss me too much" I slowly walked to my room waving at her. She glared at me and before I closed my door I heard Alice call out for her.

"Bella, where are you, I have to do your make up now!". Bella grunted towards my direction and then stomped her way back into the dungeon. I couldn't stop myself from laughing.

Throughout the day I assisted June with some housework. I asked her more questions about what my mum was like when she was eighteen. She sounded so much like Alice that now it was no surprise that Alice was the way she was. June also said that my mum cared for little things, which June said I inherited.

Whilst working on an assignment I got bored and so decided to flick through my drawings, something I hadn't done since Bella had a look at them. I had a look at the portraits of my family that I drew; there was one of Alice when she was just 14, her cheeky smile was evident through the led pencil. I looked at the picture of my mum and dad and it made me start thinking that if it wasn't for pictures and photographs the memory of their appearance would start to fade even though I missed them terribly. Just in that moment I decided that I would draw a portrait of everyone I love each couple of years so I could capture the different moments in their life. I started off with June since Alice was still out.

"I don't know if I'll be able to sit still". June said trying not to move her face much.

"That's alright it shouldn't take too long anyway". I replied while I began outlining June's face and her features. The hardest part was getting the depth and length of her features right, I kept reworking on the lines until the page softly held June's face. After outlining I would have to work on the details such as shading.

"Sorry Edward, but I need to get water I'm not feeling too well".

"What's wrong June, here I'll get you the water wait right here". I ran to the kitchen and poured some water into the glass for June as quickly as I could because she really didn't look good. When I ran back to her she was holding her chest with one hand and the other was gripping the seat very tightly.

"June? What's happening? I'll call the ambulance." I ran to the phone and dialled the ambulance. I gave them our address and told them to hurry as I thought June might be having a heart attack.

"June, can you hear me? How are you feeling?"

"I just have…a lot of…pain in my chest".

"It's okay the ambulance is on their way". I patted her head with water and opened the windows to help her breath. I waited anxiously checking the window but did not want to make it obvious so that June would not begin feeling anxious too.

Finally the ambulance arrived and I went with them to the hospital. I rang Alice once the doctors told me that June is in a very vulnerable state to have a heart attack so that we had to make sure she took her medication and went on a safe diet. June had to stay in the hospital for a few days, so once Alice visited her us two went back home.

"You think she'll be okay?" I asked Alice.

"Well as long as we follow the doctor's orders then I don't see why not. Anyway Edward, she is getting old, I mean these things happen a lot to old people." I looked at her worried, was June really getting to that stage where bad things would begin to happen and tear her already fragile state down? Alice saw the worried look on my face and took one hand off the steering wheel to hold my hand.

"It's alright Edward; whenever we need to we'll tackle the problems together, just try and think positive".

"Yeah okay Alice, you're right. Thanks." I squeezed her hand back and relaxed a bit knowing that whatever would happen with June in the future I would have Alice, and that would be enough to keep me living.

It was around four o'clock when we arrived home and I had to help Alice bring all her shopping bags into the house.

"Man, what happened? Did you win the lotto or something?". I asked Alice who had tons of shopping bags.

Alice laughed "no, the shops were having a sale, we got some nice bargains!".

"Did Bella hear what happened with June. Will she be coming back over tonight?"

"Nah, she left before you called because she was having some family friends over or something."

"Oh okay".

I packed away the unfinished drawing of June and started getting dinner ready. I saw a mobile on the kitchen table, it didn't look like Alice's so I picked it up. There was one unread message so I thought that if I had a look at the message at least I would figure out whose mobile it would be. Okay it obviously could have only been one persons, but I suppose I was being a bit nosy. The message read: _Say hi to Edward for me! ;). _I looked at the sender and it was from Jessica. I rolled my eyes and cringed. Why can't she just get the hint that I don't like her? Well because _now _I knew for sure that it was Bella's phone I told Alice.

"Can't you just take it to her Edward? I want to put away all my clothes before they get wrecked, pretty please…?".

I rolled my eyes "Alright, I'm going to walk over there, I'll be back home soon if you even care".

"Thanks Edward! You're the best brother ever!". She kissed me quickly on the cheek.

"Yeah you owe me one sis". I said just as I left.

The grey clouds were only just beginning to show so the little warmth that the day brought could still be felt. But I took my grey jacket with me anyway because sometimes Forks weather was unpredictable and rain would just be around the corner. I recognised Bella's house straight away. There was an extra car parked in front of the house, and I could hear laughter and chatter coming from her house. I felt a bit nervous, as I made my way up the stairs of their porch, since they had company. I knocked on the door and waited.

"Hi Mr. Swan, Bella left her mobile so I just wanted to give it back to her". I said without pausing because I felt like I had to give the excuse why I was here straight away so he wouldn't be angry that I interrupted or anything. For some reason I had a feeling her parents didn't like me, especially since this was the first time I've seen him since the incident, so they must think I'm really weird.

"Oh Edward, hello. How nice of you, I'll go get Bella so she can thank you herself".

"Thank you". Man was he intimidating.

He left the door opened while he went to get Bella so I had a quick glance at where the noise was all coming from. I saw Bella's mum on the couch with another women and a man who I presumed were together because of the proximity between them. I heard Bella's voice and saw her making her way down their long hall way to the door; I pretended I wasn't snooping in. For a second I thought she was talking to me so I looked at her direction. But she wasn't, she was talking to a boy behind her who looked the same age and he kept trying to grab on to her hand. He didn't seem to notice me but I could tell Bella was looking at me.

"Wait" she said as she turned around to the boy. He looked up, noticed me and then turned around and walked away. Bella never mentioned anything about having a boyfriend.

"Hey Edward"

"Hey Bella, you left your phone at our house, here you go." I explained fast because I didn't want to take her time away with her boyfriend. I handed her the phone.

"Oh thanks, you didn't have to waste your time bringing it to me, so thanks a lot"

"Yeah by the time I get home it's going to be so late...". She laughed and then looked kind of nervous and closed the door a bit more. I kind of got the hint that she wanted me to go.

"Well I better let you get back"

"Why? I mean... yeah okay"

"Don't want your boyfriend to be jealous" I teased and shoved her a little bit but then regretted it incase her boyfriend was watching and gets angry.

"What? Oh his not my boyfriend, just a family friend". Her tone sounded angry and she blushed. This seemed like a sensitive subject so I left it.

"Oh okay" maybe she was lying. I wanted to tell her about what happened to June but then I stopped myself because I didn't want to intrude with her and her boyfriend or whoever they were. So I left.

"Well I better go"

"Okay then"

"Bye Bella"

"Bye Edward"

"Good to see you made it back safe" Alice said sitting down next to me on the couch.

"Yeah. Hey does Bella have a boyfriend?" I really felt like Bella was lying for some reason, the guy just seemed so close to her.

"No whys that"

"Oh I just saw some guy over and she said it wasn't her boyfriend"

"We talk about everything, so no, it's not her boyfriend". Maybe Alice was lying too for some reason, or maybe the guy liked Bella, meh who cares.

"Anyone call from the hospital about June?"

"Nah, but don't worry we'll call tomorrow to make sure"

"Okay then. Wanna watch a movie?" Suddenly a wave of tiredness and just nothingness blew over me, so I just felt like watching something funny that would lighten my spirits up. I suppose that's what happens when your grandma, who's like a mum to me, goes into hospital.

"Sure, you can pick I don't feel fussy today"

"That's a first. Hm lets see...I want something light, how about Father of the Bride?" Alice was happy with my decision so we made popcorn got our blankets and together watched the movie. This was how it was like in the old days and this is how I wanted it to stay.

**Thanks for reading everyone!**

**Kath :)**


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